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Entry tags:
inbox / purgastory.
HELLO
"You've reached Elysium! Lost? Need an ear? I'm your guy! I'll get back to you as soon as I can."
GOODBYE
TEXT | VIDEO | VOICE | ACTION
inventory bc i don't know where else to put this:
cursed chihuahua papers
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Yeah? On you? Drinks and all?
[ AGREES TO THIS RANDOM REQUEST FROM THIS RANDOM PERSON ]
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You don't need money here! But sure, we can grab some drinks, too.
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That's not how you win someone you've just met over. You need to get into the immersion! Say you're getting me the finest pizza and the finest drinks! All on your dollar!
[ He clears his throat. ]
Let's try that again. Ahem. Cut!
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You're a weird guy! [THAT ISN'T HOW TO WIN PEOPLE OVER EITHER.] We only have cheap pizza! If you want really good food, I'd have to cook it myself.
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It's the bare minimum effort needed to meet the most sought-after guy in Purgatory, c'mon. But I guess for a newcomer, I could make an exception just this once.
Cheap pizza's fine. Where are we off to, new friend?
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Is that you? Haha. [DON'T JUST HAHA ABOUT IT!!!!!] There's a new Pizza Hat! I'll meet you there, okay? And pick up some drinks on the way. Do you like beer?
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[ He sighs, but it's the kind of overdramatic sigh that is clearly not meant to be taken seriously. ]
If you have any other requests while I'm at it, we only ever meet for the first time once.
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[HE REALLY JUST CALLED SOMEONE AT COMPLETE RANDOM.]
That's good, though! [The way he meant that he himself could pick up the drinks but like. He's not going to correct Elysium...] I'll bring this snack bag! Bye!
[JUST HANGS UP AND VANISHES.]
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Whatever, we ball. Elysium shows up with a party popper and a party hat for some reason… where is he. Also, a lot more than just drinks by the look of the bags (plural) he has in his hands. ]
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This is so fucking funny. He's waiting outside of the Pizza Hat with a bag full of snacks, kind of glancing around in a bit if a lackadaisical way. When he spots this bozo showing up all decked out, though, he just raises a hand in greeting and laughs.]
Are we having a party?
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In greeting, he blows the party popper in his fellow bozo's direction. Thank god none of these establishments are staffed by actual people. ]
Aren't we? It's your welcoming party, yeah. Woohoo.
[ ignores that he is like one week late before he proceeds to plop another party hat atop obikawa's head. ]
It's Elysium! And if I'm remembering correctly—you're Señor Obikawa.
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This is so fucking funny though, he will just accept the party popper and the hat.]
I was here just as long as you guys, though! Just in a different part! It was worse because there wasn't any food or people, though. [HELL FOR HIM!!] That's me, yeah! Obikawa Kiyoshi!
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[ Says that one last as he's yet to meet him… ]
What was out there?
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[His fucking cage comrades... They're just out there. ANYWAY as he starts to head into the Pizza Hat:]
Doors and mountains with ice and stuff!
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Follows him into the Pizza Dahat instinctively… ]
How did that happen? Someone [ yaywon ] rounded you all up and stuck you in one? Or did you just suddenly find yourself in it?
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It was after that hand freak unzipped the air to show us the flower field with our people in it.
[me realizing this means timeline-wise they got the reveal before anyone else since they were trapped in the cage for multiple days which is hilarious honestly.]
After I got out of that place, I was in the cage and that weird rat was there with the key but it wouldn't let us out.
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Obikawa… ]
Good thing you guys didn't have to spend the entire month in there… man. That's one way to go crazy. But to your welcoming here and your escape! Both are pretty worthwhile causes to celebrate.
[ pfft. ]
Do you know what kind of pizza you want?
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There's no way it would have gone on that long! Toe would have shot that rat before then.
[WHICH AGAIN WOULD HAVE PROBABLY BEEN A MERCY. This rat really had to endure so much and for what. But he'll move up to the counter wahoo!!]
I like anything! As long as it isn't corn and mayo.
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Should we make a super pizza? Add all the toppings besides corn and mayo?
[ FOCUSES ON WHAT MAKES SENSE (super pizza) INSTEAD OF WHAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE (toes shooting rats, though, tbf, this is somewhat easier to make sense of over everything else…) ]
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Woah! Yeah, let's do it! I've never had a super pizza before!
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NOT THE IMMEDIATE APPROVAL OF SUPER PIZZA!!!! MY GOD ]
Yeah? Yeah?? It's been a while since anyone's spoken my language! Let's do it!
[ beelines for the kiosk. this is about to be such a disaster. ]
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We should put double of the best toppings, too! That way it'll be twice as good.
[Is that how it works.]
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Oh, for sure. Double cheese, double meat. What else do you you think we should double up on?
[ at this rate they are not picking up a slice without it dropping all its spaghetti ]
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Mushrooms are good! And bell peppers. Make sure to get pepperoni and sausage, too. Also the crispy little hams! Not the big floppy ones.
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Crispy little hams… bacon? All of that's counted under double meat so you're good. Unless you wanted triple of those specifically.
[ but they need those floppy ones to go with the pineapple, obikawa. hmmm. one order of that, then. ]
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