inbox / purgastory.

[transmit]

HELLO

"You've reached Elysium! Lost? Need an ear? I'm your guy! I'll get back to you as soon as I can."

GOODBYE

TEXT | VIDEO | VOICE | ACTION

inventory bc i don't know where else to put this:

cursed chihuahua papers

Comments

[transmit]

We just talked about how nice it was for them to be validated anyway, though?

[ The desire to yeet may be rising. ]

You're such a busybody. That behaviour has comforted a lot of people here.

[selfconcept]

[ YEET HIM ]

"Me validating people? Yeah. People want to feel validated for the things they do. I don't care about it personally for my own things and to put my standards on someone is unfair and it's something I'll never do."

[ He's quiet. ]

"Are you one of them?"

[transmit]

You say you don't care, but that doesn't necessarily mean you don't appreciate it when it happens.

[ If Hien were anywhere but one of his blind spots, he'd give him a look. Stupid. ]

Yeah. That's why I wasn't epistemic about what I said.

[selfconcept]

[ Hien just won't acknowledge the first part anymore, because he doesn't feel like arguing about it. Let Elysium believe what he wants to believe.......... ]

"If it helps you... then... I'm fine with that."

[ His voice almost trailed off, but he managed to finish it. ]

[transmit]

[ Okay…… ]

I'll flip the question on you. What about you? Why are you so interested in me?

[selfconcept]

"Because I like you and want to make you happy."

[ Easy.

He doesn't have complicated reasons... but he couldn't bring himself to say "love" instead. ]

[transmit]

[


LOVE?!?!?!?!

Elysium's thoughts aren't veering in that direction, but they're certainly going somewhere. ]

… What about your happiness? Don't give me the nonsense about everyone's happiness being your own, because that's what I tell people.

[ elysium like pot kettle but i expect you just to just accept it ]

[selfconcept]

"... But that's how I really feel."

[ he's just fuckin appalled like how dare you assume that it's false ]

"I feel happy when I see other people happy. Unless you want some kind of dissertation or something about it."

[transmit]

Yeah. Give it to me.

[selfconcept]

[ Hien rolls his eyes (affectionate), but he's quiet about it, trying to think of a way to put it. ]

"... I like violence."

[ That's what he'll start with. ]

"I like fighting. I like antagonizing others for fun. I like seeing them break down in real time when I erase their desires and ambitions in front of them. I like seeing them get fucked up beyond belief because I believe that it's fun at the time, like deleting the memory of why someone is fighting so hard for something that they can't even remember that they scream in anguish in trying to recall. It makes me happy seeing the horrors on their face. I relish in their reactions and take in their dying words as something like a collector's trophy."

[ He looks up past Elysium's feathers and hair at the "sky". ]

"... But I like seeing other people happy too, because I don't get to see something like that as much anymore."

[transmit]

For liking all those things, you sure haven't let them define you in the slightest.

[ What else is there to say to that? ]

That's what you mean by vacation, huh.

[selfconcept]

"Mhm... "

[ He mumbles idly. ]

"I've been behaving. I also like the people here. Except for that one time when I tried to out-eat Obikawa. I think a lot of pent up stress exploded for that moment."

[transmit]

What you do when you don't have any obligations says more about you than the other way around.

You don't think so?

[selfconcept]

"It's still a part of me regardless, and something people will have to eventually face if they hang around me long enough... whether I have obligations or not. I just wanted to fight him and maybe eat a god on the way. I got what I wanted, even if I died from it."

[transmit]

Uh huh. I'm awful at thinking that far, though. Guess I'm stuck making judgements as they happen.

[selfconcept]

[ Hien is a little quiet as he processes things in his head for a bit, still looking up at the "sky". Does he feel at home under the bright, starry sky? Has he ever felt that? It was a simple night in Paris while sitting on the edge of the fountain. ]

"Same here, and I'm the one who has to live long."

[ He gives a small peck on the neck. ]

"Though despite everything... I like living. I'd live forever if I could."

[transmit]

[ is this… yaoi? 🏳️‍🌈❓🤨 pries open hien's brain.

But there's a quiet 'hey!' at the peck, followed by the roll of his shoulders. Don't fall off, buddy. ]

Living is how you have new experiences, yeah? And how you meet new people. I don't know about living forever, but… having more time wouldn't be a bad thing.

[selfconcept]

[ lol lmao ]

"... If I wasn't here, I would give you more time."

[transmit]

[ wrings your lol lmao out of you ]

Would you? Then how would we define how much time is enough?

[selfconcept]

"Until you grow old and die naturally."

[ Hien sighs. ]

"Like memories, I can also control the concept of life, but... it needs a lot of practice and it doesn't work here."

[transmit]

Hmm… Yeah? That does sound nice. Obikawa was saying I'd dry up like a fruit and it'd be satisfying to prove him wrong—people can age gracefully, but I think my choice of profession might get in the way of that next.

[ haha. ]

What a conundrum, huh.

[selfconcept]

"I know that you'll do your best in staying alive."

[ Though he would also like to get rid of Elysium's oripathy too, but he's not a miracle worker. He can only infuse life into something, not get rid of something so physical. ]

"So keep living to prove Obikawa wrong."

[transmit]

[ That's the thing, isn't it? He isn't sure about living that long. He doesn't know what his 'best' would look like, not when Mantra's varying degrees of exasperation towards him are so vividly etched into his mind.

Ignoring orders. Disregarding his life to save others. By his own measure, that is, to him, what he'd wanted his beautiful journey to be. And yet, it sits uncomfortably at odds with what he's just said.

He keeps all of it to himself. ]

I might get into juuuuuust as much trouble as you if not a little more so. If you're going as far as extending my life, shouldn't you be keeping an eye on me, too?

[selfconcept]

[ binch!!!!!! Hien is only slightly aware, because he thinks he knows the kind of person Elysium is, and thinks Elysium is overthinking something stupid. ]

"You say that like I'm a troublemaker."

[ the audacity of hien saying this ]

"I'd like to keep an eye on you forever, but if things go the way they should in Purgatory, I might not be able to."

[transmit]

[ truly, the audacity. He keeps himself from commenting on this and 'forever' being at odds with any natural lifespan, feeling a twinge of guilt that prick the inside of his chest.

It's easier, then, not to address it at all. ]

With how things will probably end? Ah. It's possible that next week might even be it.